Butt Scratch Fever
Dear Blog:
At 9:43 this morning, my left buttocks itched. I promptly took care of the situation.

Afterwards, I became concerned. What if I had an itchy butt at an inappropriate time and place? I don't want people to see me scratching my butt in public. Maybe I should pick up some talcum powder.

But I vowed to stop buying things! What a dilemma.

I know what I should do! I'll just ask my mom. She and Dad are going to join me for Easter dinner anyway, and she always has extra talcum powder on hand.

Fortunately for me, my mother is a talcaholic.

Revelling in my own wit,
- Bernie  ¶ 12:35 PM